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  The guilt of knowing Spence had in fact been hurt so badly in the name of protecting her made it easier to pretend to dote on him on the ride home. Once his leg had been set and his nose taped, he’d been released into their care. The police weren’t a problem for them, no doubt thanks to Gabe.

  Together, Vance and Jessie got him up the stairs and into his room. Jessie cleaned him and helped him into his pajamas while Vance unloaded her things.

  “I’m so glad I have you with me,” Spence patted her hand affectionately once she’d tucked him into bed.

  Jessie couldn’t help but smile, the guy had enough pain medicine in him to tranquilize an elephant and it was making him loopy.

  “I know you are,” she told him. “Now get some sleep. It’s been a long evening.”

  With Spence out, she refused to do anything else until she had a shower. The clothes she wore were tossed in the trash on her way by. She stood in the steamy water so long her skin turned pink, thinking about all that had happened and wondering what she was going to do with her entire life’s savings gone.

  “Jessie,” Vance tapped at the door. “Are you okay in there?”

  “Yeah, sure. Be right out,” Jessie reluctantly turned off the shower and wrapped herself in a towel.

  “I put your clothes in your room and I have a beer with your name on it out on the balcony.”

  “You’re my hero,” Jessie smiled, waiting for Vance to walk away before darting down the hall to the room she’d been given. She had no illusions that she’d been given her own room out of respect. She had her own room for the evenings Spence brought home diversions. The why didn’t matter—she was just happy for what was.

  She quickly dressed in cotton pajamas and scurried out to meet Vance on the balcony. He acknowledged her presence with his eyes then went back to watching the street below.

  “I like what they’ve done with the Washington loft district,” he commented.

  “It is nice.”

  “You’ve had a busy day.”

  Jessie nodded at that. To think, she’d woken up this morning wrapped around Gabe in the middle of the woods. When she’d seen him this afternoon, they’d pretended not to know one another. And there was the whole mess with seeing her boss get his leg broken to keep him from feeling amorous, too.

  “I don’t suppose you have any idea why Spence was jumped today,” she finally decided how to broach the subject.

  “Looks like a rumor somehow got started about him possibly skimming cash off from his associates. That was a warning shot. You know, I heard it around anyway.”

  “Is he?”

  Vance answered with a look that said she was stupid to ask that question. Stupid because the answer was obviously yes or stupid because it was obviously no?

  “Thank you,” she studied his profile. Sometimes it was hard to remember that he was only twenty-five. Maybe it was his sheer size, maybe just his calm demeanor.

  “I don’t like what you’ve got yourself mixed up in, but I’ll do what I can to keep you from getting yourself killed.”

  “You probably know enough about everything to end all of this right now,” Jessie blurted as soon as the thought occurred to her.

  “But I don’t think Gabe has dreamy-enough eyes to risk my life over.”

  “I’m not risking my life over some guy’s eyes,” Jessie snapped. If she had to classify one thing about him worth risking her life over, it was probably his laugh. Although, he did have nice eyes; they tended to change from golden to warm brown depending on his mood.

  “Sure,” Vance looked over at Jessie with a disgusted snort.

  “I’m not having this discussion with you right now.”

  “Look, just be careful. You’ve stayed with Spence for 14 years because you were scared of what he’d do to you if you left. That’s nothing compared to the guys you’re tangling with now.”

  “I’m not tangling with anybody. Not really.”

  “You just keep telling yourself that, sugar, and see how it works out for you.”

  “I need to be done, Vance. I just want to live before I die.”

  “Yeah, I know,” his tone softened. “Look, I’d better go get some sleep while I can. Jason’ll be outside the front door all night if you need anything. Try to have Spence up and coherent by four. He has guests coming for drinks.”

  “Drinks?”

  “Don’t worry; the staff will arrive in plenty of time to clean the place up.”

  Jessie merely nodded. She had never realized how different Spence’s world was from her own. She wondered if it had always been that way, or if it was just one more byproduct of his new acquaintances.

  It took her a while to fall asleep that night. She lay there long into the darkness, curled around her pillow as her mind ran wild. She missed Gabe so much the longing twisted itself around her insides. When sleep did finally stake its claim, her dreams were dark and turbulent.

  While she did manage to wake up in time to meet Harmony as promised, Jessie felt like she could barely drag herself through the routine. What’s worse, Jessie found herself unsure what to say to Harmony. Their easy camaraderie was gone and she didn’t know how to fix that. Her friend seemed to defrost a bit towards the end of their time together, giving Jessie hope that time would heal the rift between them.

  When she arrived back at the loft, Spence was calling for her from his room. Despite his complaints that his leg and face were throbbing, she denied him another dose of pain relief for fear he’d be passed out when his guests arrived. Instead, she concentrated on getting him ready despite the groping hands forever hindering her progress.

  When she had him dressed and as presentable as he could be under the circumstances, she got him settled on the couch in front of the television and turned her attention to her own wardrobe. Her progress was interrupted by a knock at the door.

  “Plan to do some light reading?” Vance questioned from her doorway. Jessie paused mid-mascara stroke to cut her eyes his way.

  “What are you talking about?”

  “A courier just delivered this,” he held a worn book out.

  “Oh. That,” Jessie’s mind scrambled for an explanation. One glance at the title told her who it was from. “I requested it from a used book store this morning while I was out. I didn’t expect it to be delivered so quickly.”

  Vance merely arched an eyebrow as if he didn’t believe a word she was saying, laying the book on the foot of her bed before striding out of the room. She forced herself to finish putting on her makeup before curling up in a corner chair with the book in her lap.

  She lovingly ran her fingers along the leather binding, re-reading the title with a small smile. He’d sent her a book about the life and death of Jesse James. When she opened it, she instantly noticed the writing on the first page. “If found, return to 9722 Gravois Road, Apt 35D, St. Louis, MO 61154.”

  Jessie furrowed her brow. The ZIP code didn’t seem right. The writing didn’t fit, either. It looked too new and crisp for such worn paper. Gabe was trying to tell her something. Until she had more to go on, she contented herself to thumb through the comfortable pages.

  She was feeling good about things by the time Vance announced their company had arrived. One look at the entourage in Spence’s living room told her she’d been entirely wrong in her assumptions about who he was working with. Vance had been right—she was in way over her head.

  Chapter Ten

  Sometimes the world changes and although you know it, you forget to take that into account. This is the thought that ran through Jessie’s brain as she registered the fact that the family Gabe was after was not Italian, but Bosnian.

  She supposed it shouldn’t matter. It wasn’t as if the Italians were pussycats or anything. But they seemed to have a certain restraint to them the Bosnians weren’t known for.

  St. Louis hadn’t been exactly an ethnically diverse town when she was growing up. She was happy that had changed. Her beloved Cherokee Street was often referred
to as Little Mexico. And in the ’90s, a flood of Bosnian refugees to South St. Louis brought new life to a dying town. Little Bosnia was a flourishing and vibrant community.

  But with good often comes bad, and the organized crime syndicates born in the war-torn Eastern Bloc were hardened to say the least. Spence was a fool to have messed with them. She knew now why the police weren’t concerned about catching Spence; they were just hoping he’d lead them to the boss before he got himself killed. It was a matter of when, not if.

  And now they knew her face. She understood what Gabe was telling her with the book, why he’d been so insistent on whisking her away.

  Warning bells sounded in her head as the leader of the group leveled his gaze on her. His broad head and close buzz cut gave him a pit bull look. The scar on his left eye made her think he’d once been in danger of losing it. Now the orb stood lifeless in its socket. The effect was chilling. She kept her expression bland and tried to be nothing more than an ornament at Spence’s side.

  “You have a new girl?” the man nodded towards Jessie. “I’d have thought you’d be too busy with other concerns right now to be acquiring new ornaments. Even ones with legs like a thoroughbred.”

  “Jessie here has been one of my girls since the early days,” Spence patted her as if she were indeed a horse. “Turns out she makes a pretty nurse, too.”

  Jessie wasn’t sure how to respond to that, so she smiled and rose to refill drinks. Spence dismissed her as she set the decanter down, dashing her hopes of gleaning anything valuable from the visit. With one last glance at the three men in a desperate attempt to commit their faces to memory, she excused herself to her room where she jotted down any distinguishing characteristics she could remember on a tissue.

  Even as she did so, she felt like a fool. The cops probably knew all of this. But she had no clue what she was supposed to be looking for. It seemed obvious until the moment came. Now… not so much.

  She knew when his guests were gone because he began calling her name. With a sigh, she set aside her Jesse James book and obediently went to see what he needed. His normally olive complexion appeared bleached; the fear was evident in his eyes. She reminded herself that he got himself into the situation; it wasn’t her doing.

  Still, it was more than for show when she stroked his cheek reassuringly. She pitied the man.

  “It’ll be okay,” she knew her words were hollow.

  “What do you know about it?”

  She ignored the insinuation in his voice and went to get his pills off the bar, pouring him a slug of whiskey to wash them down.

  “You could make it all better,” the tone of his voice changed. Jessie knew by that tone it had occurred to him she’d been in his home a full twenty-four hours and they’d not had sex once. That was a wasted day in Spence’s world.

  “I could?” she replied in a sultry voice, straddling his lap as she spoke. “Whatever do you mean?”

  He leaned towards her just as she leaned back.

  “First, you’d better take your medicine,” she held the bottle and the Jack Daniels up.

  “What a good nurse,” he smiled and obliged, in too much of a hurry to pay much heed to the number of pills she’d given him.

  “Just give me a second to slip into something else. I think you’ll like it,” she slowly crawled off his lap, taunting him as she went. “You just lie back and rest while I’m gone.”

  She strolled saucily back to her room, closing the door behind her before curling up in her chair again with her book. Thirty minutes later, there was a light tap at her door. She opened it to find an amused expression on Vance’s face.

  “How much did you give him?”

  “Enough,” she smiled a little guiltily.

  “Just make sure he’s coherent again by noon on Wednesday. He’s supposed to oversee a sale.”

  Jessie winced without thinking. She knew the goods exchanging hands would be a girl, probably around Harmony’s age or younger.

  “What makes me different from them?” she asked suddenly. “Why protect me and not them?”

  “Would you rather I do neither?” he shot back.

  “I guess I’d rather you do both.”

  “Some problems are too big to tackle. Hell, Jessie. You’re more than I can handle as it is.”

  Jessie gave a half shrug, unsure what she could really say to that.

  “Don’t forget to feed him,” Vance took Jessie’s cue and dropped the subject.

  “Of course not.”

  “And try not to make him OD. That would be a tough situation even for your cop boyfriend to help you out of.”

  “I’ll remember that.”

  “I’ll be back in the morning, okay?”

  “Hey Vance,” Jessie grabbed his arm as he turned to go.

  “Yeah?”

  “I don’t suppose you can pave the way with Harmony for me?”

  “I’ve been trying.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Anything else?”

  “No. Sorry… thanks,” she let go of his arm and stepped back awkwardly. Loneliness settled over her as she watched him go. Before she’d met Gabe, it might not have even occurred to her.

  She read a few more chapters of the Jesse James book, completely sucked into the story of his life. She amused herself for a while by cooking Spence dinner and finding new ways to slip him extra pain medicine. She went to bed early and beat Harmony to the gym the next morning, even with taking time to feed Spence some Vicodin-laced pancakes.

  Harmony was slightly less frosty and Jessie decided to call that a win. Harmony even asked if Jessie wanted to meet her on the street for dinner.

  It felt good to sit in the breezy back room of the Stable on Cherokee Street under the shadow of the old Lemp Brewery. Anheuser-Busch might be the lifeblood of St. Louis, but it was the old Lemp Brewery that held both mystery and charm. That’s why Jessie liked it so much. Instead of a typical plain brick circa 1970 building like A-B, Lemp had an eerie beauty that was enhanced by its ornate stone carvings.

  Jessie ignored the look Harmony gave her when she ordered a pizza. She was starving. All Spence kept in his refrigerator was tofu and other equally unappetizing and labor-intensive food. Her body needed a Bud Light and a carbonara pizza. She’d work extra hard in yoga the next day.

  Other than the disapproval of food choice rolling off of Harmony in waves, things seemed better between them. Like maybe she’d forgiven Jessie for so quickly disappearing from her life.

  “Vance says I’m getting a new roommate.”

  “Really?” Jessie frowned. She hadn’t thought of that. “Do you know who?”

  “They haven’t said anything,” she shook her head. “I guess I’ll find out soon enough. She moves in next week.”

  “Maybe she won’t be as lazy as me.”

  “You were hardly lazy.”

  “Will we still work out together?”

  “As long as Spence will let you,” Harmony quickly agreed.

  “He’s in no shape to disagree with much right now,” Jessie snickered. She didn’t want to think much past the time when she ran out of those handy little pills.

  Once the thought occurred to her that she could use all of his medicine too quickly, she began to ration it a little more carefully. Of course, she compensated by pouring larger glasses of Jack to chase them with.

  Sometimes Spence would be coherent enough that she’d relay messages from other staff members and get instructions on household items to be completed in turn. Sometimes she’d sit at his side or give him a shoulder rub as she listened to his incoherent and rambling fears.

  It was a very human side to Spence she’d never seen before. It made her hate him less and pity him more—even for just a little while.

  At night, she curled up with her pillow and conjured up memories of Gabe. If she thought hard enough, she could almost feel him in the room with her.

  Somehow the days rolled by and she managed to pass the time. She also managed to hav
e Spence sobered and cleaned up by the time Vance appeared on Wednesday morning.

  She also considered it a lucky break when Spence demanded she ride with him to the sale. It seemed her new role in Spence’s life was to be his ornament. An ornament he often forgot was there when he spoke to his business associates. Jessie wished Gabe would meet with her soon—both because she missed him, and because she was worried she’d forget an important detail.

  “I’ll be happy when this day is over with,” Spence pronounced crabbily once Vance and Jessie had him stuffed into the back seat of the Mercedes.

  Jessie tried not to smirk. His head was probably killing him since she’d only given him a fraction of his usual dose that morning.

  “We’ll get you home as soon as we can,” she promised.

  “No, it’s good to be out. I just want to get Aleksandar off my ass.”

  There wasn’t really an answer to that so Jessie just nodded sympathetically.

  The sleek black car looked out of place in the rundown neighborhood Vance drove them through. They pulled up in front of an abandoned warehouse. Jessie waited in the car with Spence while Vance disappeared inside. He returned a few moments later with a young girl tucked under his arm almost protectively. She was tall but thin enough to be considered waifish, with wispy blond hair and dull blue eyes that fixated on Jessie with hatred.

  She squirmed under the weight of the girl’s gaze. She knew it condemned her as a traitor to their gender. Jessie wanted to assure the girl she was one of the good guys. But a question tickled the back of her brain—would she be helping free this girl if not for Gabe? Or would she have continued looking the other way so long as there was food on her table and a roof over her head?

  She felt dirty and small in that moment, with Spence’s arm slung over her shoulder and his mouth constantly finding her shoulder, ear or neck. It took every ounce of willpower she had to not shrink from his touch. She struggled to resurrect the wall that had always been her haven in the past, but to no avail.

  The ride to the posh end of town was a quiet one. Ladue was a suburb of St. Louis with old money and sprawling estates. The Mercedes pulled up to a wrought iron gate in front of a mansion that bordered on castle. It was the largest home Jessie had ever seen in her life. She couldn’t imagine what it would be like to live in a place like that.